All Fall Down
by Of.Winged.Poets
Summary: Iggy is haunted by his blindness. Max is lost in her failure, ready to give up. Both think the Flock is dead. Fang is dying, drowning, falling, and still trying to save their souls. Niggy, Fax
1. Iggy

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Step out the door and it feels like rain  
That's the sound, that's the sound, on your window pane  
Take to the streets, but you can't ignore  
That's the sound, that's the sound, you're waiting for

* * *

Violin chords crashed like waves against his mind, a stormy ocean of sound to match his mood. He lay in darkness, eyes open, unseeing. The mattress supported him, but crushed his wings into his back. He crossed his arms behind his head. No one would know who he was, what he was. He looked like a normal man, staring at the ceiling of his apartment. No one would know. No one needed to know. They could not perceive his wings. They could not perceive his blindness.

A bitter smile twisted his mouth. They were blind to his blindness. He thought it funny in a gloomy way. He had done a good job of hiding it from all but his family. It wasn't a secret, but he liked to know that it didn't show. He was more than adept at living without sight. He had heightened senses of hearing, touch. He could cook and work. That was not the problem. Maybe there wasn't a problem. He didn't know.

A steady rhythm beat below the pulsing melody of the violins. Rain? He tilted his head, got up and unerringly found the window. He pressed his palm to the chilly panes, traced his fingertips to the ledge, and lifted it open. Cool drops hit his face and torso. He lifted his face to moisture, eyes closed. If there were tracks on his face that were not caused by the rain, he didn't admit it. No one would know.

He just wanted to see, just once. He could barely remember what it was like anymore. When the Flock had settled, he had moved out, wanting independence, needing to prove himself perhaps. Unfortunately, it left him alone with his sightlessness, his curse. He no longer had Gazzy to be his eyes. It had been too long since he had seen the Flock. He missed them, and it put him in this melancholy mood. Thankfully, they were coming over for dinner. He smiled genuinely, remembering how Max had complained about not having him to cook. She said Fang's cooking was almost as poor as hers. He remembered hearing Fang's indignant retort in the background, Angel's quickly stifled giggle.

He closed the window broodingly and shut off the music. The quiet soothed his emotions. He paced restlessly, needing...something. He strode to the door, deciding impulsively to go for a walk, even though it was raining. He had enough time before the Flock showed up for dinner, and a little water never hurt anyone, especially not a bird kid who had been through much worse.

His feet hit the concrete with a distinct wet sound. He could hear the sound of a car trundle down the road. Wet leaves rustled in the stormy breeze, shredded by falling rain. He walked down the sidewalk, getting drenched by rain. He didn't particularly care. Rain was nothing when compared with what they'd been through.

He walked forward like a fallen angel. His light extinguished by too harsh circumstances and dreams unfulfilled. He cursed the blindness that stalked him, his own personal demon. It whispered his destruction to him from the shadows, his constant foreboding. It promised to never let him win, told him he could not succeed. It was there whenever he failed, the constant reminder of his inadequacies. He couldn't vanquish it, and it was becoming harder to ignore. All of his triumphs were tainted with its inky presence.

He heard a clock bell chime from one of the old building down the road. It was later than he had originally thought. He began to get a foreboding feeling as he easily avoided people walking the other direction. The Flock should have been there already. They should have arrived before he even decided to go for a walk. He turned to go back. Maybe he had missed them because of his little walk. It wasn't unlike Max to be late.

Then he heard it, that sound he'd been waiting for, the swish of avian-human hybrid wings. His spirits picked up. He turned to greet the Flock. The smell of blood mixed with the scent of rain, and his heart nearly stopped. Fear flooded his veins.

"Iggy..." An anguished voice spoke.

"Nudge, what happened? What-" Staggered footsteps moved towards him, and he just managed to catch her body as she slumped forward. He knelt on the concrete, cradling Nudge in his arms. He could tell that there were no more people around; everyone had gone inside, away from the rain, so it didn't matter that her wings were only half folded. He brushed her hair away from her face. His hand came away sticky with blood.

"What happened? How badly are you hurt?"

"I'm fine." She waved his concern away with false confidence. "We were attacked...right before we left." Her speech was starting to slur, her words separated by pauses when the pain became too much to bear. She stuttered in anguish. She had lost too much blood. Her mind was becoming foggy

"There were so many...so...so many. I've never...seen that...many...So much blood. They killed everyone...Angel...and Gazzy...and-and Fang...and Max." Her voice broke on a sob. "I-I had to-to tell you. You're the...only one...left." She drew a labored breath.

Horror filled him. If he had been there...if he hadn't left...if he had noticed how late it was getting...He didn't know that Nudge was watching him with sorrow filled eyes. She raised her hand to touch his face. He covered it with his own.

"It's not...your fault." She managed. It was getting harder to speak. He heard her weakness and let her hand drop, running his fingers over her injuries.

"How badly are you hurt?" He felt panic. He was dawdling, feeling sorry for himself, while Nudge was dying. He started to pick her up. He was good at playing doctor, but Nudge needed a hospital. He had to get her there. His mind filled with determination. She put a hand to his chest to stop him.

"Iggy, it's too...too late." He knew it too.

"If I can just get you to a hospital-"

"I'd rather...die...out here...with you...than in a...hospital bed," she said. He couldn't see her blood mixing with the water on the sidewalk. He couldn't see her tears falling with the rain, but she could see his.

"I...probably should've told you...sooner-" She couldn't keep going, but she had to. "Should've told you that I...that I..." The words wouldn't come. She was struggling just to draw breath.

"It's okay. You don't have to say anything." It was strange for Nudge to be without words. He didn't see her mouth form the last words, didn't see her last breath leave her. He held her until the tension left her body, sobs racking his frame. They made a terrible picture. Her body, painted with blood. Wings bloody, half open, shredded by the stormy flight. Tears leaking from his sightless eyes. His body racked with emotion, with guilt. Both of them, besieged by the harshly falling rain.

He lifted sightless eyes to the sky in a wordless cry of agony. Why? What was the purpose? Why her? Why them? He couldn't help but blame himself, blame his blindness. He knew that any of them would have blamed themselves. There was a strange comfort in that connection, but it didn't dull the pain. He was alone. The darkness pressed in around him, promising hope. He knew that there was no hope to be found. The demon smiled a wicked smile. _I told you so._

* * *

_If ever your world starts crashing down  
Whenever your world starts crashing down  
Whenever your world starts crashing down  
That's where you'll find me (yeah) _

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	2. Max

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God love your soul and your aching bones  
Take a breath, take a step, meet me down below  
Everyone's the same, our fingers to our toes  
We just can't get it right, but we're on the road

* * *

Max stared at the wreckage of her home, it covered the lifeless bodies of her Flock. _Angel, Gazzy, Nudge...Fang._ Tears came to her eyes. She didn't fight them. What was the point? Who was there to be strong for now?

Everyone had been happy. The promise of seeing Iggy and his incredible cooking lifted the moods that the tight packed city often left gloomy. Even Fang had been smiling. Then they had found themselves under siege. M-Geeks and Flyboys had poured out of nowhere, proclaiming Iggy's destruction and swooping in for the kill. They fought, but one by one they fell. Gazzy's bomb took out more of the house than the enemy.

Max saw Gazzy fall, saw the light leave his eyes. She saw Angel and Nudge disappear into the cloud of Flyboys. Saw two bodies fall. She watched as Fang took on hundreds of M-Geeks below. The overpowered her, and she fell.

When she regained consciousness, they were gone. Fang was dead. His wings were crushed beneath the wreckage. She checked his pulse, begging him to wake up. She spotted Gazzy and Angel's lifeless forms. Angel was almost completely buried. She could only assume that Nudge must be somewhere near. She searched the wreckage halfheartedly, her will to hope not quite as strong as her grief. She brought the rest of the house down with Gazzy's last bomb. It was the best resting place she could offer them.

She felt empty, numb, unbelieving. There had been no warning, no way out. It felt like a dream, a nightmare. She couldn't wake up. She saw Fang's lifeless face when she closed her eyes, replayed Angel and Nudge's fall, saw Gazzy's bleeding form. She couldn't shake the images, tried not to imagine Iggy's death. The visions haunted her and so did the uncertainties.

Had she brought this upon them? If she hadn't agreed to settle down...if she hadn't fallen...if she had been more prepared...if she had listened to the Voice when it told her not to settle...She wanted to give up. She hadn't saved her Flock. She couldn't save the world.

She flew away, leaving it behind. She flew as high as she could go, faster and faster until she couldn't bring herself to keep going. That high up, she felt closer to them. She knew if there was a Heaven, her Flock was there. If anyone deserved it, they did. So she felt like she could almost touch them, this close to the stars. She wondered if anyone up there even cared anymore. Maybe she was just a lost cause.

She came back to earth. Her very being hurt. Something was telling her to keep going. Something was telling her to give up. Something was telling her to just let go, that she was no better than anyone else, that they were all the same, that they deserved the same fate as her Flock. Something else was telling her she had another chance. She had to keep moving, take another step, follow the right road, so she kept going, alone.

Her failure followed her, weighing heavier with each movement. She didn't think she would save the world. She didn't think she could. Maybe it was time for a wakeup call. If she failed, they would have to see the truth of their failures like she had. She knew she would be to blame, when their world came crashing down. She couldn't bear anymore blame, so she kept on fighting. But she had seen her world fall. She was watching as the world came down, despite her feeble rebellion. She saw their eyes filled with blame. Watched them point a finger at her. She flew on. She didn't apologize. She wasn't supposed to do it alone.

_If I fail again, do I get another chance? If I get it wrong again, what happens?_ The Voice was happy to tell her she was on the right road, but it never offered her real help. The world was going up in flames, and she was almost tempted to help it along. At least then she'd see her Flock again.

* * *

_If ever your world starts crashing down  
Whenever your world starts crashing down  
Whenever your world starts crashing down  
That's where you'll find me _

* * *


	3. Fang

_Lost till you're found  
Swim till you drown  
Know that we all fall down  
Love till you hate  
Jump till you break  
Know that we all fall down_

* * *

Fang twitched, his heart feebly stuttering. Light flared and pulsed behind his eyelids like flames or lightning. He knew he was dead. It wasn't a surprise. He'd known since the second he saw Max fall. What reason had he to go on now? Who was there to care if he died?

He wasn't afraid to die, not frightened of the unknown void reaching out for him. He'd never been afraid of the dark. At least in death he would be uncaged.

He saw Max fall in his mind, saw her limp form plummet to the ground. She was dead. He might have cried if he could have, but he was beyond even tears. He didn't have any reason to stay, no promises left to keep.

No, he wasn't afraid to die, but he was afraid to wander, so afraid of walking, walking alone and in silence down a hard path for all eternity. He would walk alone, and he was afraid of that. He who had ever known true fear, never known what it meant to be alone, would be forced to wander into death, through death, forever.

Would Max and the others find him? Surely he had warranted some type of relief. He had saved as many as he killed. But he had killed them, killed the Flock with his failure. And there would be no forgiveness. No one would find him as he wandered through the wilderness. No one would cast forgiving eyes upon his lonely form.

His shadow would be his only companion, a permanent piece of darkness.

Fang drowned, fell beneath the dark waters of unconscious. He was not dead, but he floated. And he fought, fought not to stay alive, but to stay undead, to keep from wandering. Max was not in the world of life, but neither would she be in the world of penance.

She was too good for that. Leaders take the blame, shoulder it in life, but that is their penance, their forgiveness. Fang did not have that. He might never see her again.

They had all fallen, literally dropped from the sky. Their wings were too fragile to shoulder such a burden. The weight of the world had crushed them. He was not the only failure, but he would willingly pay the price to save their souls. It was what he did.

He would save them in the only way he could, protect them as he always had, his trouble going unnoticed. He would pay for their salvation; pay his debt and theirs (although his was probably the greater of the debts).

He would pay until he was too bitter and lost and alone to remember where he had been or where he was going, pay until their faces, her face, were all he could see. And at that point he would hate. He would hate them because he loved them too much. All the emotions unspent in life would find him.

And he would keep going. He would walk and suffer until it destroyed him.

There was no one left to save him, no one to lift him. But it was better than a cage, better than the guilt he was now crushed under.

He could not stand from the weight. He felt it would crush him flat. To lift off the ground, to jump for the stars, for the sky, for flight…would break him. And he couldn't afford to break yet. He had to pay for them, pay their toll.

He would pay it by walking, slow and mortal-like; pay it in seconds and minutes, days and weeks, months and years of eternities of solitude. He would pay it in forgetting, in yearning, in guilt, in never seeing them again. He would pay. And he would do it willingly by walking down the road of death for them, for her, forever.

She, they, had fallen in the fight, died at his side. He should have saved them. The destruction was his; the destruction was him. They were one and the same. He would bear the shame and pain of their deaths, watching again and again as she fell, her fall more graceful than his.

It was his fault and therefore his blame. They had all fallen, but they did not all have to suffer for it.

He winced at the pain that shot through his body, but the wince was just a twitch. His muscles were too numb to spasm, his wings too crushed to beat. But the darkness was welcoming him, promising to heal all wounds.

So, no, he wasn't afraid to die. His fear was far greater.

His feet were already set on the road, the darkness morphed into death. The lights flickered and went out. And there was solitude.

* * *

_If ever your world starts crashing down  
Whenever your world starts crashing down  
Whenever your world starts crashing down  
That's where you'll find me_


End file.
